I’m going to be blunt. I picked this game to review because I expected it to be quick and easy, whilst the game that I had intended to publish a review for today made me rage quit, and thus it seemed inappropriate to review it at this time whilst I’m a little angry at it. Within the last 15 minutes I have installed, played, and formed an opinion on the game $1 Ride, so with that all in mind, I’m going to crack on.
This game is a prime example of you get what you for. It’s selling, presently, for £1.49, so a bit closer to two dollars, but still low enough that I feel my point will stand. It’s a bad game for a low price. Did you of you ever play the swoop bike minigames in the old Knights of the Old Republic games from Bioware? That, effectively, is what this game is, though instead of having any real reason to want to do well, you’ve got a highscore; instead of a floating motorbike like vehicle, it’s a space-ship; and instead of hitting boost-ramps so that you can go faster and avoiding obstacles, you’re trying to pick up fuel, points and rockets, whilst avoiding obstacles and things that slow you down a lot more than they should.
And that, I think, is the main issue with the game. The slows. Don’t get me wrong, it hasn’t got a lot of substance, it’s far from the sort of game that’s going to keep you entertaining for prolonged periods of time, but the underlying premise is (loathe as I am to admit it) solid. Picking up fuel to keep going. There’s some other game like that, but I can’t think what it is at this moment in time. The slows, however, pretty much instantly end your game. You can’t recover from them. This all means that you have to rely entirely on reaction times to be able to make it anywhere.
There is another problem. Typically, even with a full speed bar, you can only afford to miss a speed boost once before you need to get another. This means that, even at optimal gameplay, you can only pick up points every other turn, because of the need to pick up speed – but it can’t be a slow speed boost, because despite hitting them, they don’t always get you to the next pickup. Do you understand what I’m saying, here? You can pick up a speed boost, but it not give you enough speed to get to the next speed boost. The execution is so terribly flawed that I can’t help but wonder if it was play-tested at all. I very much doubt it went through a beta testing process. The only real thing the game has going for it, beyond the concept, is the fact that when you’re going suitably fast, the level zooms out a bit, giving you some extra time to get into the correct lane.
Because that’s all the game really is – using left and right to get into the correct lane, so you don’t run out of speed and still get some points. It’s Subway Surfers. It’s Temple Run. It’s crap, but it costs £1.49, so people abide it. I have seen all that I need to see of this game in the 11 minutes I’ve spent playing. I’m being serious. The game is not a long-term investment. It isn’t presented as one, I’ll give it that, but it’s definitely not the kind of game that you are going to sink any meaningful time into. I genuinely think I’ve spent more time writing this, than I have playing. Mull that over for a moment. This has taken me longer to write, than it took me to be sure that THIS was what I wanted to write about the game. Coming from the guy who, initially, expected it to take him a year before he would be comfortable enough with his opinion on Cyberpunk 2077 to commit it to the internet.
If you’re looking for a game that ought to be on mobile, to play on your computer, then fine, this could well be a decent game for you. If you’re looking for something fun with a little sustainability, then this is a hard pass.
4/10
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